.....D:Let's just say my report card came in.
It's my fault. It's all my fault. My 3.07 GPA...It's my fault. I could've done better, but I didn't... I...I....I.....
I really don't know, anymore. Honestly.
So much for college.
I bet working as a burger-flipper for the rest of my life aint all that bad.
I guess.
I chose this, I suppose.
It's my own fucking fault.
...Ahh...ahah....I sh... ... I don't know.
I really don't.
Maybe if I wasn't so fucking lazy.
Maybe if I put some fucking initiative into my fucking schoolwork. Ahah...Oh god... What am I going to do with myself? I'm a wreck. I...I...I need some chocolate...
This is honestly not what...
...
...
...
Augh!!!
This is so-...
...
No. It's no use, I brought this upon myself, time to pay the consequences. I...I'm sorry for spamming your inboxes with this pointless rant... I... I'm such a failure.
Th...there's no point in crying, either. It won't change my poor descis...descisions.... G-goddamnit! Why am I crying?! I...I'll just go drag my miserable excuse of a person off to go despair somewhere. Even though it won't help at all.
*Sigh* This is ironic. I guess the fact that my dA mood got stuck on 'depressed' applies now. >_>" Ahah...I doubt they had a 'self-loathing' mood, anyways.
I hate myself so much, sometimes. God, I sound so out of character, but, it's true. I...I really shouldn't let this get to me, but...I... I... I can't help myself... Y'know...? Ahahah...hah...
I'm just really not in the mood for much of anything, right now. I'm gonna go... I dunno... sulk. Man, I really don't sound like myself, right now...
I'm sorry for devoting an entire journal entry to bitching about myself... ;___; I guess I kinda needed to let it out...
S...sorry...I'll probably delete this journal, anyways...
~~~~~~~~~~~
Edit: Approximately 2 hours later...
Well, after a few hours of locking myself up in my bedroom, and a supportive phone call from my mum, I feel a whole lot better~ A little crying can go a long way, y'know? Sometimes ya just gotta let out that frustration. >w< Ahah, I'm so dumb for letting this get me down! It could be worse, right? At least it's not something devastating, like a 2.0 GPA. O___O Then I'd REALLY be upset. XD After all, I need to get at least a 3.5 GPA, overall, in order to get into a good college. Competition is freaking tough. x_____x" So, next year I'm shooting for straight A's. All along the line, baby. >8D I feel better than ever, right now! I think I was just a little upset, and frustrated earlier, but now, I'm all right. >w> Time to delete the angsty bits! Thanks for your support, everyone! (...Maybe I should've calmed down before making a journal, in the first place...? XD)
...DANGIT, DEVIANTART! D: I still can't change my mood thingy. Ugh...>3>"
Depressed
Devious Comments
yes, thats right.. :3
I understand your hurting, but once you pick yourself back up, see this as a wake-up call, you are not a failure!
Failures dont care or do a thing about failing. (I know cause theres one in the family)
I've been in the same postion where i feel really useless, mostly because im not going to a big and mighty art school like i wanted because i was too lazy to get scholarships in highschool. But i woke up and decided to think positively and take things step by step. Theres no rush, take your time.
Dont let yourself be put down, everyone fails one time or another, its only a obstacle not a end.
You are worth more than this, and I really hope you feel better!
I feel bad for you!
well... don't they have "up-grade" programs where you are? They usually have those at community colleges in my area.
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"Every moment gives us a chance to become more than what we are." -Ryu (Street Fighter III)
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This is How it works, You love untill you dont....
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But I say just don't worry about it, and try hard not to slack off next year XP Especially if you're going into your Junior year of High School -shakes head- I sorta slacked off and that's a HUGE No-no, since that's the year colleges most likely look at >_<
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This is How it works, You love untill you dont....
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